I remember it vividly. Everyone was a complete nobber and nowhere near as grown up or clever as I. This list of excerpts from a new book is as revealing as it is funny. If only I possessed the teen diary of my fourteen year old self. Oh, the scorn and ridicule I could pour on that little twat. Not that he was any worse than the others, it’s just that round about that time everything seems so important. It is not until you get older that you realise that life is far too important to take that seriously.

I’m particularly fond of the list that appears about halfway down. The delicious angst of it all.

Of course, I know supposed grown-ups that respond like this now.

Work experience is such a pain

Parents are so unreasonable

Life is disorganised

I’m far too immature

I’m too fat!

Keep being called a goth

Never got any money

Tired all the time

Bunk a lot now

Smoke quite a lot

Started drinking regularly

Keep on crying all the time

[From 'God, I hate Mum – she's such a slapper' | Life and style | The Guardian]

Listening to: Opening from the album “Glassworks” by Philip Glass

[Edit: It seems that I am still able to be inadvertently pompous, listening to Philip Glass indeed!)

Technorati Tags: funny, teen, teenage angst

I have yet to figure what it is that I did to piss the plug in off so much that it should blurt this out. Perhaps it is suffering from some kind of browser Tourettes?

I’m guessing a nonce in this usage is not referring to what I think it is…

Technorati Tags: funny, plugin insults

[From Seismic Waves]

I’ve been Twittering more than blogging these days, I have to say that I think I might be getting a little bored by the Internets. Sure there is still a lot of interesting stuff out there but I’m not sure that I care enough to write about it. That said I have been thinking a lot about writing again these days. Inspiration may be coming my way.

Mexico and US rocked by earthquake

The Guardian World News 05/04/2010 11:15

Two dead in border town of Mexicali as buidings shake and roads suffer major structural damage in 7.2 magnitude quake

A 7.2-magnitude earthquake yesterday struck cities in northern Mexico and southern California, tearing up roads, making buildings sway from Los Angeles to Tijuana, and leaving at least two people dead in Mexico.

Mexican officials said at least one person died in a collapsed house and about 100 more were injured in yesterday’s quake, one of the strongest in the area for decades.

Another person, who panicked as the ground shook, ran into the street and was struck by a car on a darkened street in Mexicali, a border city near the epicentre of the quake, that was almost entirely without power.

The earthquake struck at 3.40pm (10.40pm GMT) about 38 miles (60km) south-east of Mexicali, according to the US Geological Survey, with a shallow depth of six miles. Three aftershocks of magnitudes 5.1, 4.5 and 4.3 followed within the hour, and dozens of smaller tremors struck later.

“It sounds like it’s felt by at least 20 million people at this point,” USGS seismologist Lucy Jones said. “Most of southern California felt this earthquake.”

Technorati Tags: fun, funny, Twitter

Ape Lad sez, “Dresden Codak, a very funny webcomic, has this handy chart of ’42 Essential Third-Act Twists’ for writers.”

42 Essential 3rd Act Twists(Thanks, Ape Lad!)



[From Essential plot twists for writers]

Technorati Tags: funny

You simply submit your slogan and other bozos vote for your it. I say bozos because no one seems to like mine.

Not that I’m bitter at all. I’m just misunderstood dammit.

TypeTees – T-shirt: Zombies only want you for your brain.

Technorati Tags: funny, geek

[From Comic for August 2, 2009]

Technorati Tags: Dilbert, funny, work

A man in the United States popped out to his local petrol station to buy a pack of cigarettes – only to find his card charged $23,148,855,308,184,500.

via BBC NEWS | Americas | US smoker chokes on cost of habit.

Frankly, I’m more surprised that he didn’t have a heart attack. I think it would have killed me stone dead.

Technorati Tags: funny, News

have it your way, jerk

Technorati Tags: funny, internet, passive aggresive

Real live Wookiee?

It was really difficult not to post this image. It is a lazy article (both on here and the guardian) but still pretty funny.

I always imagined Iran to be kind of sandy, so big men covered in grass with guns should stand out like a Wookiee.

Does this also mean that some of those Australian Jedi that I’ve been hearing so much about are available as back up?

Or perhaps Tim needs to get this book:

Tim Dowling on how to tell an Iranian sniper from Wookiee? | World news | The Guardian.

Technorati Tags: funny, jedi, News, Star Wars

Apparently today is National Cleavage Day. Who’d of thought it? This is crass commercialism gone horribly wrong! How dare this corporation take a perfectly natural and wonderful thing and turn it into a way of making money.

I’m disgusted. I for one will not be spending the rest of the day going through the campaign gallery page and I suggest that you don’t either. Really, don’t, there is nothing to see. It contains only pictures of people pretending to campaign for something or other. I ask you what does that have to do with a cleavage?

National Cleavage Day – Wonderbra.

Technorati Tags: funny