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After too long I turned my hand to writing a review the other night. If you are following me on Twitter then you will have seen that I mentioned that it turned in to something of a rant. I’m not sure what forced me to vent my spleen on this particular record (it will remain nameless for the time being) but even though the resultant rant was, well… ranty, it was entertaining.

It reminded me of something that I said a while ago that writing bad reviews (and by that I mean giving something a bad review rather than writing the review badly) was pretty easy; turning a review into something that was even-handed is hard. It is not big or clever to tear into someones art due to laziness. Someone has sweat blood and tears over it. In the case of Axl Rose, someone has spent a large portion of their life working on it. That said, slagging the crap out of the record in question was pretty cathartic. It is not finished yet but here is an excerpt:

The band has taken a template forged in the sixties and slavishly recreated it with little imagination. Guitars swirl, distort, and of course reverse. Vocals sound like a very pissed Phil Spector recorded them from the other end of an exceptionally long tunnel. There is even the conceit that there are two sides to the record like the compact disc that the recording is burned onto was never invented. There are not two sides. In reality, there is barely one song.

…and so it goes on. I asked on Twitter whether ranting was still considered writing, one of my friends responded with the helpful advice:

No. Ranting is vitriolic unfiltered garbage that emerges from the deep dark cesspit inside you.

Writing is self-indulgent edited garbage that emerges from the creative side of your brain.

I didn’t get around to thanking him. I think he was trying to help and he has a point. Self-indulgent edited garbage that emerges from the creative side of your brain cuts both ways. All art to a greater or lesser extent is garbage. Someone, somewhere will hate it with such passion that you will wonder why you bothered. The artist presumably bothers because s/he wanted to provoke an emotional response from someone, anyone. In that event then vitriol should also be an acceptable reaction. People like the above, nameless band or Axl Rose or Tracey Emin or anyone that puts something out into the public domain sets themselves up for such criticism. Furthermore, I argue that they do it on purpose. They open themselves up for attack from without, from people like me. Moreover, by writing reviews, ranty or otherwise I open myself up for similar attack. I guess we all just want to have our opinions heard and even recognition that someone can’t stand what you did might be recognition enough. I guess what my less than scholarly deductions are pointing to is the conclusion that tearing into a peice of art is fine because the creator would want that. Thus, giving me carte blanche to be mean in print to some poor deluded fool (or fools) who thought that they had produced a good record.

Or I could be looking for an excuse to write more rants …because it was fun.

To view more of my bile on follow me on Twitter @marcaprice

Technorati Tags: PopMatters, rant, Reviews, Twitter

This could have been dull soulless dance music. It wasn’t, or at least not completely. Although you really need to be in the mood for it. I’m not most of the time. I think that I might have been when I listened to this record for the first time.

Shedding the Past is a collection of eleven Detroit-style techno tunes by German techno engineer Shed. It is a record in the mold of Aphex Twin with a powerful skipping beat that is the trademark of this German hotshot.

[From PopMatters, Reviews

Monkey – Journey to the West

I wasn’t terribly impressed with this “soundtrack” of a stage show. There are a few good tracks but it is only worthwhile if you just want a souvenir of a show that you have been to. Still each to their own…

Those Gorillaz have returned in the guise of a completely different primate. This one comes complete with a tale and a fully furred opera in tow. Who would have thought that Damon Albarn had an opera in him? In fairness, it is not strictly speaking an opera. It is a spectacle theatre piece that has more in common with Cirque du Soleil than Glyndebourne. Albarn and fellow gorilla Jamie Hewlett have created a nine-scene show that is a mixture of acrobatics, kung fu, lush sets, and the music contained on this recording. This stage production has proved to be quite popular in the United Kingdom. The dear old BBC adapted a track, complete with a specially made Jamie Hewlett animation, to promote their coverage of the Beijing Olympics. Furthermore, tickets soon go on sale for a special run at the O2 “Millennium” Dome, just like Prince. Things are looking good.

[From PopMatters, Reviews

Anyone that covers a Velvet Underground song on a record is already on shaky ground in my book. If that cover version happens to be terrible then the book is closed on them and they are no longer allowed to be my friend. CIAM are such a band. They will not receive a Christmas card this year. However, I know there are people out there that are curious. So, the record is free from http://www.ciammusic.com/. If you really must then you can get it from there.

With track titles such as “Misunderstood”, “Here I Am”, and “Looking for Love” CIAM are pushing the right buttons for the disaffected youth. Jeff Shapiro’s vocals are a predictable baritone on most of the tracks, sounding not unlike a young Wayne Hussey at times. Furthermore, a spotty teenager with no friends probably wrote the lyrics. Not a great start.

[From PopMatters, Reviews

DJ Yoda – Fabric Live 39

This was a lot of fun and I did use the CD for a party. It went down a storm with only a few people asking “what the hell is this?” …but there are always such muppets at a party. It was my party and I’ll play what I like.

The Fabric nightclub in London is one of the capital’s hottest venues. Many international DJs hit this club, which prides itself on its very broad music policy. The range of music played inside can be sampled by perusing the FabricLive Mix Series selection of releases, of which this is the 39th episode. DJ Yoda is in the house this time, and he takes full advantage of the huge palette afforded him.

[From PopMatters, Reviews

I didn’t like this record at all. It did nothing for me and I do not condone or advertise it on account of its dullness.

The cover of Bloodlines looks like it was lifted from an episode of the X-Files. It draws you in with its mystery, two people running into the light. They are running into the unknown, running from something equally unknown and unknowable.

[From PopMatters, Reviews

Death Set – Worldwide

Sometimes records come along that blow away all cobwebs and preconceptions of what music should be like. This one just make you think damned hard. It is a school bully of a record that duffs you up until you like it. It is lots of fun but you really have to stick with it.

As usual here is an excerpt. The full review is on PM.

Eighteen songs, 26 minutes. You just know that with statistics like that, the CD that you have put into you player is going to be out of the ordinary. The longest song on this album is two minutes and 24 seconds. To be honest if the songs were any longer your head might just cease to be in a fit of pique.

[From Listened to: Heard It All Before from the album “Worldwide” by The Death Set